Broken Glass
by Waterpiska
Summary: Once glass has been shattered it can be glued back together but it can never be the same. Kagome is taken by Sesshoumaru in heat. This story follows her as she copes with her new life and finds it within herself to forgive and to love again.
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1**

Kagome gave a melancholy sigh as she soaked in the onsen. She should have been happy, but frankly she was lonely. Sango had bailed out on her again. She had this fear that too much bathing would peel of her skin. Kagome chuckled as she remembered that discussion. But really, she had wanted to talk to her about InuYasha's weird behavior. He had been acting so nice…not that she minded, she just felt that he was hiding something from them.

Suddenly she felt a shiver. Her first thought was Naraku but she felt none of the overpowering darkness that came with his presence. Still the presence was strong and heading her way quite quickly. Fear crept into her heart as the hot spring was far from camp. But InuYasha would come to save her if she was really in danger. Still, shivering she dashed out of the onsen and threw on her robe. She looked frantically for her bow and arrows and then realized with growing horror that she had left them at camp. The snap of a twig in the clearing sent her twirling in fear as her eyes met the blood-red eyes of Sesshoumaru.

It was then that she knew something was very wrong. Sesshoumaru's eyes were the color of cold amber not red. She'd only seen his eyes this color once, when he'd lost control in his father's tomb.

"What do you want from me" Kagome asked in a quavering voice. A sinister chuckle escaped from Sesshoumaru's lips. He looked over her scantily clad body with lust apparent in his eyes. That was when she knew he was in heat.

"Sesshoumaru-sama don't do this, I'm human" Kagome choked out. He advanced towards her slowly and said "Yes he doesn't like humans, but it's my night to play." Walking around her slowly he delicately sniffed her neck. "Ah, untouched and a miko, this will be fun."

Kagome shuddered and then in a burst of desperartion brought hjer palms to his chest and released as much energy as she could. Sesshoumaru was blown back into a tree. Staggering, Kagome turn and ran into the forest.

Branches whipped across her face tearing at her hair and clothes. She ran quickly knowing that once Sesshoumaru got up he would catch her. She ran though the trees frantically at last spotting a clearing witth someone in it.

"Help me, Please" she screamed hurtling to an ubrupt halt at the sight at the sight that greeted her. It was InuYasha wrapped around Kikyo's naked body.

Pain sleuced through her heart and ager coursed through her veins. So this is what he'd been hiding. She felt Sesshoumaru's presence closing in on her and screamed "InuYasha, please help me." But he ignored her plea. _I'm right here why won't he help me_ she thought knowing that she was out of time. She could here the snapping twigs behind her in the forest and knew Sesshoumaru would get her.

She gave an agonized cry as he caught up with her, pulling her hair and snapping her head back. Red eyes a glow he looked at the scene in front of her with what may have been amusement.

"Scream all you want," he whispered sinisterly into her ear "he's to occupied to care". A tear slid down her face and as he pushed her down to the ground, she knew that the truth behind those words hurt her more than anything he would do to her that night


	2. The Incident

Chapter 2

InuYasha woke up on a warm, soft body. "Kagome" he whispered. He looked up from his body pillow into the face of Kikyo. Memories of last night rushed back to him. _Cold flailing limbs, nails raking down his back, a long slender neck bared to his fangs and in the background someone screaming his name._ He had mated Kikyo but she had still been cold dirt, not warm breathing and supple._ He remembered right after he pulled his fangs out of her neck there was a light, bright and pale, pale pink and then darkness clouded his vision as he collapsed. _

It was light out he realized with a start. He jumped up and began putting on his clothes thinking 'I'll never hear the end of it from that wench'. But he knew he had to tell his group that he had mated Kikyo. If they couldn't accept her he'd tell them that he would have to leave. That would make Kagome cave. As he walked out of the barrier InuYasha was assaulted with the smell of blood, Kagome's blood and the salty smell of tears.

"Kagome" he gasped. Guilt filled his mind as he dashed out of the clearing and into the forest. He was only a yard into the forest when his foot connected with something cold but soft. He went sprawling onto the floor. Springing up with a growl, he turned to see what had tripped him. The site before his eyes turned him cold inside and filled him with despair.

Kagome lay on the forest floor dirty tear tracks across her face. A bruise tarnished one side of her face. InuYasha's gaze traveled lower and slid across her torso. Purple and red mottled bruises marred her breasts. Her garment was sullied and torn, the robe dirtied beyond repair. He gulped and looked farther down to the source of the smell of blood. The robe underneath her legs was soaked with blood. It coated the inside of her thighs and ran down to the forest floor. On her hips were bleeding claw marks that disappeared under her body. Rage and sadness filled InuYasha as his eyes settled on her wrists bruised from being restrained. His eyes frantically searched for the little jar she carried around her neck. He spotted it chain torn and tangled in her hair. He picked it up puzzled. The shards were still there!

That, that meant that the bastard who'd done this to her had done it for their own sick twisted enjoyment. He eyes bleeding red he sniffed at her body. Puzzled he sniffed again, he couldn't tell who the demon was, they hadn't left a scent behind.

Distraught he turned to close her eyes and he heard a faint sound. A heartbeat, she was still alive! Unaware of the red that had bled into her eyes he grabbed her and shook her gently but insistently. "Kagome, Kagome please wake up" he begged. She shifted and stirred in his awareness slid back into her eyes. He sighed in relief. She turned her face towards him and looked him in the eye. Time seemed to freeze but then her eyes widened and she screamed.

"Please, I'll be good I won't fight anymore," she whimpered "Don't hurt me anymore. Please just kill me." She began to shiver and tears ran down her face dripping onto InuYasha's haori.

"Kagome it's me, InuYasha" he said, horror evident on his face.

"I…nu…Yasha" she said confusion in her eyes. InuYasha saw her eyes harden and then he knew that she knew about him and Kikyo.

She saw the guilt on his face and then she knew it hadn't been an illusion. Her face crumpled and fresh tears ran down her cheeks. He had abandoned her in a time of crisis so that he could get a good lay.

The wind blew through the clearing and she shivered. It was then she fully realized the state she was in. Crimson-faced with shame she pushed off of InuYasha and ran through the forest. The memories of last night threatening to overwhelm her.


	3. Memories

Chapter 3

She ran with apurpose, to escape and erase the shame. Branches tore at her exposed flesh making small lacerations on her face and arms. It hurt but she welcomed the pain. She welcomed anything that would divert her from the memories, those terrible, terrible, memories.

As she ran a branch connected with the bruise on her face and unbidden a memory swelled to the surface of her mind overwhelming her.

She bucked against him writhing and screaming for InuYasha. Even with only one hand he restrained her easily. "Yes keep screaming it's not like he cares at all does he" Sesshoumaru whispered cruelly in her ear. In a fit of desperation Kagome turned and bit his ear relishing the taste of his pain. Shocked and hurting he let go of her wrists. She turned and tried to crawl away. She felt him growl and saw his hand descend towards her face. Her head snapped to the side and pain radiated from her cheekbone down to her neck. A moan passed through her lips as she spat out the blood that filled her mouth. Looking up into the angry red eyes of her captor she realized what she had done would make this ordeal very, very, painful.

Yes, he'd gotten her back for that little trick. Tears pooled in Kagome's eyes as she cradled her smarting cheek. As the burst of adrenaline faded she stopped running and began to limp painfully in the direction of the hot springs.

Entering the clearing she crawled to the water, relieved to see her clothes were where she last left them. Grabbing her bathing supplies she pondered what she would tell the others. They would hate her if they knew. But if she lied Shippo might notice. As she descended into the water, the pain hit her full force and another memory surfaced in her mind.

She was panicking, crying and biting as she desperately tried to escape. Logic quickly left her and her animalistic instincts began to flair. Predator her mind told her fight, fight, escape, run. Fear overwhelmed her and her body's last defense mechanism flared to life. It started deep within and rolled out of her past the forest boundaries and into the suroounding areas. Bright pale pink light that began to focus in beams heading in three different directions. One headed into the clearing with InuYasha and Kikyo, another one headed into the direction of the camp, and the last one plunged into Sesshoumaru.

He whimpered in fear as he glowed pink and Kagome's eyes glowed in triumph. Then the light faded and fear replaced the triumph in her eyes. And then she felt the pain, terrible, ripping pain. It consumed her entirely and overloaded her senses.

The memory left her shuddering and scared. 'Even my powers didn't protect me,' she thought. "Why?" she said a tear escaping her eye and falling into the onsen. "Why?" she repeated.

oOo

After her bath she got dressed dlowly and painfully. She grabbed her yellow backpack and turned to walk back to camp. Suddenly stabbing pain sleuced through her and she fell to the ground. Her legs refused to take her any further.

"InuYahsa" she screamed.

The speed with which he reached the clearing made her think that he might have been watching her bathe. Suprisingly, she didn't even care.

"Kagome are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine, just take me back to camp," she voiced emotionallesly "the others will be worried."

"Look Kagome, what happened with me and Kikyo, it-"

"I don't care, InuYasha," she said turning dead eyes to look in his direction. "I mean I'm happy for you but there is no need for you to explain yourself to me. Let's just go" she sighed.

He picked her up and sped towards camp worry evident in the lines of his face. 'What if she tells them that I let her get raped because I was mating Kikyo, then they'll never accept us' he thought. 'Maybe I can convince her not to say anything and to let me explain.'

'I can't tell them what happened' she thought 'They'll shun me and kick me out. Now that my powers have abandoned me I can't go back through the well.' They arrived in the clearing where the others were packing up the camp.

"So how was your night?" Miroku asked suggestively. Sango had a similar question on her face. 'Ah' Kagome thought 'they thought InuYasha finally grew some balls and made a move on me. If they only knew…' As she approached the trio, she saw their eyes roam her body and their eyes widen in horror.

"Kagome-chan what happened" screamed Shippo clearly distraught at the state she was in.

Behind her, InuYasha took in a breath, no doubt to exuse his actions, but Kagome cut him off. "I had a run in with an enraged youkai" she said in a cold monotone voice. "I lost a lot of blood so InuYasha spent the night taking care of me." Sango's eyes widened at the tone of Kagome's voice. "Are you okay Kagome?" she queried. She gasped as Kagome turned to face her with a twisted attempt at a smile plastered across her face and said "I'm perfectly fine Sango, don't worry."

But Sango did worry, about the look in kagome's eyes and the faint purple glow of the shards around her neck.

oOo

Many weeks had passé and InuYasha was getting irritated. She could tell. She just didn't want to let him know that she couldn't sense the shards anymore. So there they were on a wild goose chase after a shard that didn't even exist.

InuYasha was currently berating her for her lacking skills while she boiled water for ramen.

"Why do I have to save you all the time, fuck you're such a damn liability. Is that bow only for show. Kami you can't do anythignright can you?" he yelled.

"I'm sorry" Kagome said softly.

"If you're sorry do something bought it. Keh, Kikyo could've done better blindfolded with a broken arm." he said. Silence greeted him as he realized what he had just said.

"Ah, Kagome I'm sorry I didn't-"

"No, its okay you're right, Kikyo is prettier than me, Stronger than me, overall she's just better, I mean she is the original right" she said that twisted smile spread across her face. "It would make you much happier to have her here instead of me right? That is why you keep sneaking off every night to go meet he right?"

"Kagome, that's not what I meant."

"Whatever, I'll get dinner ready."

She put the ramen packets in the hot water and turned to get some additional spices. As the scent of the ramen wafted up to her nose she was gripped by sudden nausea and she ran to the bushes to hurl.

Sango ran to her side and asked concern in her voice "Kagome what's wrong, this has been happening for a few days now."

"Sorry guys I have a stomach cold and I don't have any medicine with me" Kagome said. The others looked relieved and returned to the fire to dish their food, but Kagome stayed behind huddled in the bushes despair filling her soul. It wasn't the stomach flu, she was pregnant.

***Sorry guys I have finals all of this week and I've been studying since last week so I apologize for the delay, it may take me a few weeks to get the next chapter up.**


	4. The Aftermath

Chapter 4

Sesshoumaru awoke on something cold yet soft. The scent of blood, human blood and tears, permeated the air and his dace was buried in thick, black hair. _Rin _he thought horrified. He pushed himself off the body and looked down expecting the worst and found himself looking upon the body of his brother's wench. _Oh, this is even worse_ he thought. _She was necessary in the defeat of Naraku. I should at least inform—_he heard a faint sound, a repetitive flutter coming from her direction, a heartbeat, she was alive. Relieved he turned to leave when the full effect of what he had done hit him. _I rutted with a human _he thought thoroughly disgusted _just like father. _What if he had made another abomination like his brother?

Turning he pushed his nose against the girls abdomen and took a whiff. Puzzled he sniffed again only to come up with the same results. She didn't have a scent! He could smell the blood that lay on his hakamas, the scent of stale arousal in the air, and the mixture of bodily fluids on the ground around them, but he could not smell her. Puzzled and frustrated he left the clearing to clean the filth off of him.

oOo

Sitting in the onsen, Sesshoumaru was hit with intense self-loathing. He should have known this could happen but his last heat had been 50 years prior, perhaps he should have visited his concubines more often to stave off his heat cycle. Frankly he was quite surprised and perhaps even a little impressed that the girl was still alive. He remembered his first heat; they had had to collect the pieces of the wench so that they could identify her. He felt relived knowing that Rin had been spared such a fate seeing as he truly did care for the child as if she were his own pup. Washing his body, he narrowed his eyes at the unsightly pink burn mark on the stump of his left arm. It seemed to tingle and burn every time the water touched it. It began to radiate pink light when he poked it with his claw, alarmed he regarded his arm impassively wondering what it would do. Suddenly the pain in his arm spiked and the pink light tore through his arm, he thrashed in the water as the pain increased and the pink light brightened blinding his sensitive eyes. He felt something crack at the bottom of his stump and the pain overwhelmed him. Eyes rolling back his head connected with the rocks on the edge of the onsen and darkness swamped him.

oOo

Kagome pulled Sango aside as the group searched for an imaginary shard that she claimed she sensed. "Sango" she murmured, blank-faced and emotionlessly, "I need a favor".

"Sure Kagome, what can I do to help you?" she asked worry evident in the lines of her face.

"I need you to teach me how to fight" she stated.

"Why Kagome? Your powers will keep you safe and we'll protect you."

"Sometimes you guys won't be there to protect me" she said bitterly expressing the most emotion she had shown since the incident, "And besides what if my bow breaks or I'm up against a human opponent, I should at least be able to defend myself" she stated her face morphing back into an emotionless mask.

Startles Sango acquiesced "Of-of course I'll teach you Kagome. In the mornings before we leave I'll have you join me in some of my warm ups, and teach you some basic katas."

"Thank You Sango, I appreciate it" said Kagome gathering her stuff and carrying it over to the fire. "Actually," Sango called out, "InuYasha isn't here so we could start now. Come on let's go to the clearing by the onsen."

"Oh, that'd be great" said Kagome, a small, dark satisfied smile playing on her lips as she followed Sango into the woods.

oOo

Sesshoumaru awoke to a pair of warm brown eyes staring down at him in worry.  
>"Sesshoumaru-sama" cried Rin, tears of relief pooling in her eyes "you're awake. Rin was so worried about—"<p>

"Leave Sesshoumaru-dono alone you insolent human" croaked Jaken. "My lord I was so worried when we found you in the springs. What happened?"

"Hn" _What did happen? The last thing I remember was that terrible pain in my arm—_ He looked at his arm and recoiled in shock. His arm, it was there! He touched it reverently, a question in his eyes.

"When we pulled you out of the springs my lord your arm was radiating holy light and it bubbled and stretched for days."

"Days?" said Sesshoumaru, "How long have I been unconscious?" he said tersely to his vassal.

"9 Days milord."

"Hn" _What does the wench want from me, attempting to snare me with an honor bound debt? This Sesshoumaru shall seek her out and make her understand I am not one to be trifled with. _


	5. Resolve

**Author's Note: To all my readers, I would like to apologize for the ridiculous delay in updating. I would like to assure all of you that I have not abandoned this story. I spent last summer in the boondies of Nova Scotia and I didn't really have access to internet. And then This year, I started my first year of college. I am a Biochemistry major and for those of you science majors out there I am sure you know how tough and time consuming the sciences can be. Well now I am out of school, and I will have some time to update again. Please be forewarned that when I restart school in August, my updates will slow dramatically. Also I just want to point out that I don't have a beta so if you guys find any errors or inconsistincies feel free to let me know, it would be greatly appreciated. Once again I would like to apologize for my delay and thank all of my readers. Now on to the story.**

Chapter 5

Kagome stretched sore muscles as she rose from her bedroll in the predawn light. Sango had been pushing her to her limits with punishing katas, hand to hand drills, and teaching her knife work. Both Sango and her had been surprised when during her weapon aptitude test, she had taken to daggers and throwing knives the best. Sango had promised her that she would buy her a set of weapons in the next village they happened upon. For the first time since the incident she was looking forward to the future. As she rose to prepare breakfast she was hit by sudden nausea. Clasping her still flat stomach she rushed to the bushes and heaved, grimacing at the acrid taste of bile. Panting, she wiped her mouth and silently headed towards the stream near their camp.

Since his insensitive comparison to her predecessor a few weeks ago InuYasha had been all too nice to her. Now every time she claimed that the shard had moved he was quick to reassure her that they would get the shard eventually. He was treating her like a princess and she couldn't help but wonder why. Kagome knew he wanted something and she figured it must have had something to do with Kikyo. Stupid, perfect, wonderful, amazing Kikyo. Lips twisting in to a bitter sneer, she recalled InuYasha's disparaging remarks over the years comparing their physique, talent, and general self-worth. It killed her to admit that he was right, she just wasn't as good as Kikyo, she hadn't had the training or even the natural ability. After the incident it was clear to her that her powers were fleeting and insignificant and without them she was worth nothing, the only thing she had over her past life was her mortality and in the grand scheme of things that wasn't worth much. Standing over the stream lined with jagged rocks she contemplated for a long moment simply allowing herself to fall head first to smash against the knife sharp edges of the rocks below. She wondered _will it hurt them if I die? _Snorting she thought _no I've been so distant that at this point that it's a wonder Sango will even train me._ Shaking her head to clear her morbid thoughts, Kagome knelt at the bank of the stream and rinsed the bitter taste of vomit from her mouth. _It's not fair for me to lead them on this chase_ she thought _but I can no longer sense the shards...Kikyo can, they need Kikyo_.

oOo

InuYasha watched Kagome run to the stream from his perch in the tree. She had been surprisingly cold towards all of them since he had found her in the forest. _I mean I could understand why she'd hate me but Sango n them didn't do nothin to her_. He still didn't know how to broach the topic of Kikyo with her. He'd been sneaking off every night to see her and she'd grown weary of being his "other women". He'd questioned her on her newly acquired mortal form but Kikyo seemed just as baffled as he was. She no longer felt safe alone but he didn't want to bring her in and have Kagome spill the beans about that night. She'd been behaving so strangely lately that he really didn't know how she'd react.

Speaking of strange, Kagome's scent had disappeared. Completely disappeared. It was as if she'd become a spirit or an inanimate object like a rock or water. It freaked him out because all of her clothes and stuff still smelled like her, but she herself did not have a scent. It threw InuYasha off because he could no longer gage her emotions and he couldn't confirm his suspicions that she was with child. She had been vomiting for weeks now, early in the morning and had an aversion to the smell of Ramen. He wasn't stupid, he'd been in villages with pregnant females before and they'd gone through the same thing. However, if she was pregnant she should have started to show by now as the father had to be a demon yet her stomach was still flat. The situation had him truly befuddled. "Ugh" he groaned putting his head between his hands, he felt awful about that night and Kagome had only made him feel worse. He remembered when he had pulled her aside a fortnight ago to truly apologize.

_"Look Kags...about that uh that night-"_

_"What night?" She said face expressionless and eyes like an artic wasteland._

_"You know, that night...the night you uh the night you uh-"_

_"The night I was brutally raped and left for dead while you got some ass from my beautiful perfect original container" she said serenely._

_"Um uh yah I-come on Kagome it wasn't like that" he spluttered._

_Suddenly her face transformed from a blank mask to a cruel condescending expression. Chin tilted defiantly upwards she said conversationally "I saw you guys that night you know, when I was running from my attacker. I ran into a barrier and I saw you guys all wrapped up together looking so fucking lovely and warm and happy and I screamed you know, I was all like 'InuYasha, InuYasha, help me' but you never batted an eye' you just snuggled in closer, nuzzled her hair and left me all alone" she chuckled but the mirth didn't reach those cold blue eyes " so please, Yasha don't lie to me and say it wasn't like that because that's exactly how it was". She turned to walk away._

_"Kagome, wait, please just wait a second"_

_She turned her face expressionless once again. "What?" She bit out._

_"This is uh hard for me, give me a second" she gazed at InuYasha expectantly._

_"I'm sorry! Ok I'm sorry. I know I should've been there for you and I wasn't so I'm really, really, sorry" he said ears down and eyes fearful._

_"Why should you be sorry," she said. "I'm sure thousands of girls get raped each night and you certainly don't care about them, what makes me so important? Look I don't really even care anymore, I'm over it" she said calmly "you need to get over it too." With that last statement, she turned and walked back to camp._

_InuYasha stared after her and thought to himself, "she's definitely not over it"._

"Well, over it or not" he thought "I'm telling her about Kikyo tonight".


End file.
